We Die Several Times, Before We Actually Die

We Die Several Times, Before We Actually Die

We Die Several Times, Before We Actually Die has been edited by Rushi Bhimani.


There comes a time in our life when we lose faith in ourselves. No matter how hard we try, we do not seem to find a way out. Life begins to feel like a maze where we are going astray. Naturally, we want someone to hold our hand and guide us. We pray, we cry, we skip meals, and then comes the conclusion, perhaps we are depressed.

However, do we ever stop to question the reason for that feeling of depression? I believe, we just assume that our conscience has defeated against a delusion. The delusion, as we know, is a fabricated figment from our conscience. Our mind tends to act as an illusionist. We conduce to feel like we are lost because we give in to the delusion; we believe it really does exist. Gradually, we hinder our conscience to reciprocate. We forget how pity is not something worth cherishing. Rather, we are in a phase where we want our friends to sympathize with us. Hence, we let our illusions take over; we prevaricate, losing sight of the real problems.

By doing so we might feel better, momentarily. We may find “true” friends, who make us feel better about ourselves. However, is it worth? Basking in the peace of something so temporary? Are those friends going to help you come out of the delusion? Is there sympathy going to vanish this figment of your imagination? The answer, most definitely, is ‘no’. If people cannot feel good about themselves, how can they see the world with the positive energy?  It is the paramount principle to live an ideal life.

In my opinion, the feeling of losing to something, that does not exist, will make our heart heavy; we will not be able to cry. We will hope, we will plead, to not to wake up the next day. But we will wake up, and end up cutting off the world. Unknowingly, losing the things and people that matter.

It is the beginning of a vicious cycle.

Let us just pause for a second, and think; think do we wish to live a life, choose a path, that is no less than committing suicide? I do understand that suicide is a rather serious word, but the life we are living is more or less treading towards it.

We are dying several times by letting our delusions act as a catalyst to defeat our conscience. Were we born to live a life like this? If no, then who is really responsible for the kind of life we live? Hard to break it to you, but it is us. We are responsible to make or break our life, define our existence.

If we do not stop, if we turn a blind eye to this, we are just going to end up getting hurt. It will leave us like a statue full of scars, enslaved to the delusions that guide us. We will barely live. Thus, we will die several times before we actually die. It will be a death, which will torment us till our very last breath.

How do we crawl out of this phase? How do we decode the tricks of the illusionist? The only way to get hold of it is to give your conscience a chance to comprehend and respond. If it demands to shout, cry, hit; just do it that will help us get hold of the illusionist and its illusion. This might not help us live fully, but at least we would not live a hopeless life.

Every day, tell yourself that it is okay to go through this kind of a phase. It is okay to lose your love. It is okay to taste failure every now and then. We need to understand that our insecurities, emotional investment, career options, and every trivial thing we fret over is just a part of our life. We have been sent to live, and die just once. Then let us go ahead the way we are meant to.

Someone once told me, “Forget everything and go on a break. Take your car, go for a drive. Spend a little quality time in the lap of nature, have a beer maybe, and just absorb the beauty of your life. The more you connect with yourself, the better life becomes. Remember that delusions are temporary, but conscience is undying. Do not let it die. Do not die several times before you die.”

And today, I pass on these words to you, whoever you are, wherever you are.


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Vyom Desai

Philosopher. Wanderer. Nuclear Engineer. Budding teacher. Kickass social worker. A true samosa enthusiast. Remember, blackberry is bae.