Privy Poet’ Society: If I Were a Poet

Privy Poet’ Society: If I Were a Poet

Privy Poet’ Society is a section of Lutalica that is dedicated solely to poets and their love for poetry. To read more from Privy Poet’ Society, click here.


If I were mad,

I’d say what I like,

I’d sing and dance all night,

And no one would judge me terribly,

For id be mad already.

If I were a woman,

I’d wear clothes and blush pink,

I’d spend hours getting ready,

And no one would judge me terribly,

For I’d be a woman already.

If I were a man,

I’d swear when I’m frustrated,

And punch when I was angry,

And no one would even notice,

Coz I’d be a man already.

If I were a hooker,

I’d walk out in a bra,

And have sex whenever I liked,

And no one would ever stare,

As I’d be a hooker for all they care.

If I were an artist,

I’d put out whatever I want,

And no one would ever say,

Why, that’s not worth my pay,

For It’d be art, did I say?

If I were old,

I’d be surrounded with all the comforts,

That the world and its labour provide,

And still complain all day,

How it was better in my day.

If I were a poet,

I’d say things as I feel,

And write them so beautifully,

That they’d make sense to everybody.

But alas, I’m not a poet,

And I can’t aspire to that end,

So I write some jagged lines,

And leave my thoughts unspent.


To read more by the poet of Privy Poet’ Society: Shocking, Hilarious Liberty, click here.

Ranjini Sircar

Ranjini Sircar - Everything Sharmaji ka beta ever wanted to be. Hopefully, in a few years I’ll be successful enough for people to say ‘She must have slept her way into that position’.