by Manan Mehta
Life has always been about achieving something or I would say about feeling the joy of achievement.
The feeling of securing the first rank in class, cracking IIT or maybe the feeling of having the first girlfriend. Getting that momentary joy has always resulted by sacrificing innumerable other moments, which may have been the ultimate joyous moments of my life.
The best joke had always been the intent of doing those things. I had never actually questioned myself. As a matter of fact, it was never really my wish to do that. On some level, I think, it was the wave of adrenaline making me do things just because I feared I would be the misfit. Looking back at the purpose of doing anything at any point of time in my life, I realised that I actually forgot to live those countless moments for nothing.
Yes, I did score above 90 while in school, I did get into the right college where my parents turned into proud parents from the expecting ones. I did everything to prove myself.
Wait a minute. Who did I prove it to?
They were always happy as long as I was.
To the society?
There are much better people.
I am still figuring out what I want in life!
So again after doing everything to get that momentary pleasure, I realised I made everyone happy but myself. Still, I ask Google how to figure out one’s passion. Even today, every morning I need to browse for motivational quotes and hear songs to keep myself going.
Today going to college has become a burden, not only for me but for most of you out there because we do things we don’t know why.
We sit in lectures and wonder about what we should be doing instead and why the hell are we here in the first place.
Is this what we wanted our life to be?
Every day getting up by the alarm. Then sleeping off to do the same work we don’t want to do the next day. I don’t think that life is limited to that feeling, instead, it is about the countless ones we give up to achieve something we don’t know why.
“It is your life so live it the way you want. Give your life the definition that suits your happiness and make the intent worthy.”
Guest’s Entry: Intent has been edited by Riya Jhala.
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