First Step Towards Interpretation has been edited by Rushi Bhimani.
1 Unread Message: “Hey mate, I know we actually haven’t really had a chance to have a heart to heart personally. But, from whatever I’ve heard and observed in the last six years, you seem to be a person with unparalleled dedication. You are definitely one of the best persons I have come across. Your conviction and genuineness truly brings out your soul. In the past six years, you are one of the best person I have come across, who is super dedicated to working that even the soul and I haven’t seen”.
This one message brought back the faith that was slowly slipping from my fingers. My faith in myself was wavering. In addition, the strength and courage to remain positive was wearing off. Thus, I desperately needed that message, those words. I was living in a phase where my inner demons were almost successful in conquering my own ideals and principles. I started losing the parts of me, that made me who I am. This appreciation worked as a catalyst that motivated me enough to resist losing my identity.
Now, I am going to use an unusual analogy. Imagine you’re a pencil and your life is a blank white paper. The way I’d been living all this while was drawing random lines on the paper and looking for the image obtained to make sense. I started analyzing my ways. That’s when I realized, the meaning of life is to create the meaning of your existence. Your life depends on how you imagine and sketch the image of your existence.
Every night, a part of me raised a question, ‘You call yourself a man of principles, but really, are you?’ I never had an answer. Therefore, rather than deconstructing my life piece by piece I started to do things that made sense to started working as a teacher in an NGO. I thought if I will work honestly and with dedication, I will be of some use to the society. However, my work unfolded a chapter of my life that helped me interpret who I really was.
I thought I was contributing to the society but as a matter of fact, it was so much more than that. I was not only teaching but learning as every experience redefined my principles. Moreover, those kids taught me of how to live. Somehow, it made me realize that my belief, that this was a selfless act, changed. Instead, I believe it was the most selfish service that one can ever do. Trying to find yourself by servicing others.
It kind of changed the meaning of altruism for me. The world probably does not have the same meaning for it. We have always learned that the deed done for the others sake of benefit is the most selfless act. I just realized that the deed we do to satisfy our own soul is the most selfless deed ever. There is a high probability that people may appreciate and respect it but it is quite redundant if it does not serve your purpose.
Gaining respect from others at the cost of killing the pretense of one’s own self-respect is like committing suicide. The entities of altruism are the deed, the things and the work that one can do to satisfy one’s soul. The concept goes parallel to the concept of how can you love the people if you can’t love yourself.
I do things for myself. I don’t know how the world will judge it. But when I work I feel good and moreover satisfied. According to this, I am performing the most selfish, no, the most selfless act of virtue. Yes, I have an ego for my work and can never compromise on it. Perhaps I can be wrong for the world but I feel proud; proud to held my head high because I stand on my principle.
I always had these questions. Why does the world object if a person does the thing he loves? Is following your passion a crime? Considering work as religion isn’t a crime, is it? I learned that nature allows no vacuum. How can one smother their own self-respect? If one can, where does the meaning of the self-respect lie? When a person realizes that, it’ll be just the nature and him/her.
Well, I say, the day we interpret our life, we are ideal. It’s all about interpretation anyway.
Writer’s note: Interpretation is an article that covers the aspect of how I learned to live. I believe that to interpret one’s own life is the finest way to live. I never realised where did I go wrong unless I got to realise where I was leading my life. Interpretation is an article that symbolises the phase of my life.
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